This Is Just Me

Born in Portsmouth, Virginia, B.A. Scott is a performing musician and songwriter. Belonging to a family of believers and lovers of music, he recalls at first not trusting or believing in his gift, until the music began to make more sense to him. In his words, "I use music to help heal those around me. I’ve been told that I sound like a lot of different people, but what I really want is for you all to hear me." Check out more of what he's up to here, or click his picture!

A few weeks ago, I was spending some time getting caught up on the NBC TV show “This Is Us”. I personally remember bringing up the idea of using this TV show title as a foundation for our annual showcase event this year. I am so obsessed with the show. The characters, the drama, the feels, all of that I love about it.

But this isn’t a plug for a TV show.

Thinking about what “us” can mean is such a daunting task. When I think about it, a couple of things come to mind. When a couple find themselves in relationship, there are considered “us”. When a group of people embark on something together, whether it be social, political, religious, or maybe just for fun, there is an “us” involved.

Last month, we celebrated National Coming Out Day. This was a day where those in the gay community celebrate the day that they were able to come out of the closet, and be their true selves. I personally think that is a beautiful thing to see someone be able to live their happiness. I love it. My best friend in undergrad is gay, and he is an inspiration to me to be myself completely. I am not gay, but there are things in my own life that at times I have been afraid to say, to believe, and even think, but watching him take on so much was what I needed to learn to be comfortable in my own skin.

I am a Christian, and I believe the bible cover to cover. I love Jesus with every fiber of my being, and I strive to live a life pleasing to Him. With that, I am commanded to love. I love everyone, no matter what their background, or belief. When it comes to the gay community, I advocate for these people because I find it unfair that they have to live in a shell due to differences in belief systems. For some reason, the church looks at gays as though homosexuality is the thing that is bringing the church down. Gay people aren’t the problem. In fact, the love and acceptance the gay community shows others who look at them and judge is an example to us all. I wish that we could all understand that we are different people, and that our differences can be the thing to bring us together. I wonder why people, and specifically Christians, look down on so many others just because they live or believe differently than them.

To bring it back, I am sad that there is even a Coming Out Day in the first place. I wish that those who are LGBT were able to just live out their truth, and that they weren’t shamed for it. This isn’t a conversation about right or wrong (which is an entirely different conversation for another day), this is having a conversation about understanding. There shouldn’t have to be a “coming out”. Let people live. IT IS NOT THE JOB OF ANY PERSON THAT NAMES THE NAME OF CHRIST TO JUDGE OR DAMN ANYONE.

While we sit here and play politics, millions of people are hurting. There is an entire generation that needs US.

US to love.

US to hope.

US to stand in the gap.

US to show what freedom looks like.

US to show what real love is. US. US. US. US.

Who is this US? US is any person who believes that there is more to this life. That there is more than what people show on the surface. More to see. More to hear. More to experience. More to grow. More to mature. More to give. More to receive. More. We live in a society where we would rather take, and use, than to give. It’s a shame. The beautiful ending to this story is the hope for the future. We can start over. We can make it so that those who come behind don’t have to deal with the same narrative.

Let's change the story, and begin something new. US. We can do that.

A personal note...I wish I knew what it meant to be a part of “us”. Personally, I have lived most of my life alone. Not for the sake of people being around, but due to different circumstances, I have never found myself as a part of a group. I am an alpha male, so many times, when a group comes around, they automatically give me leadership roles, and rarely do I ever have the chance to just be. It is a frustrating and aggravating space to live in. It also hurts. It hurts because of what people around me expect from me, and if those expectations aren’t met, then they write me off. Can somebody somewhere explain what “us” means? Or maybe how to find it? Even when I have found myself in romantic relationships, I never feel like we are an “us”. There is a them, and there is a me.

Maybe that’s what it is. There is just a me.